Passion vs Reason.. Part 2

I have always been a believer in choosing passion over reason. If only for those few moments of extreme happiness.

But today I saw these three movies over the flight, which made me realise one thing. Passion can destroy you. Passion can spoil your life beyond repair.

Movie 1: Unfaithful. Diane Lane has an absolutely passionate extra-marital affair.
Movie 2: Mandira Bedi again has an extra-marital affair with her lover.
Movie 3: Amrita Singh, mother of a girl about to be married, spends a passionate night in the fields with her lover.
Some villagers happen to see her the next day and mistake her for the daughter.
And the daughters name gets spoiled. Mother is left stunned, unable to say the truth.
Daughter unable to bear the shame and also unable to tell the world that it was not her but her mother kills herself. (Great direction by Megna Gulzar...)

Three lives destroyed by passion.

What if you knew such a woman?
What if you knew your next door neighbor's wife was such a woman?
What would you think about her?

Bitch? Whore?

What would you feel about such a woman?
Anger? Hatred? Disgust?

I would feel pity. I would feel sad. I would feel an understanding. We all desire love so much. And the way we are made, we cant help but be attracted to that love. It's the very basic instinct. And also a need to feel alive.

So when love comes knocking at your door, what do you do?
When you know this person feels more passion for you than your husband can ever do, what do you do?
What do you do when you know that a few moments with this lover can give you a happiness you haven't known for long?
Even if its wrong...
Who doesn't want to be loved like crazy?
How can a wife, neglected by her husband not give in to this wonderful and passionate lover?

And here, I want to put all blame on the husband. A woman gives you her heart, which is I think the most precious thing in this world. From the million other guys behind her, vying for her, she choose you. Yes you. You above everyone else.

And what do you do with that? You take her for granted. You give your heart to your work, you give importance to your interests.
And you forget that this is the woman, who could have wanted anyone she wanted to, but she choose you instead.

At the same time, often it doesn't mean that the husband doesn't love her. Sometimes we guys don't know how to show our emotion. Sometimes we forget what it means to the woman in our lives to be given something as simple as a lovely rose, out of the blue ,for no reason at all. Or when you surprise her by making her coffee in bed. Or when you take her out on a surprise date!

That was the romantic side of things. Another opportunity for love comes when you make a sacrifice for her. When you so want to watch your football match but you still let her watch her favourite movie. Yes love means putting her before you.

And I am reminded of the story of the Magi by Omar Henry. Christmas is the season for gifts.
But what happens when two lovers, too poor to buy each other a gift, still want to make each other happy?
The girl shaves of her hair to buy him what he wanted.
The guys sells of his watch to buy her what she wanted.
Two people, sacrifice the one thing most important to themselves, for the one they love.

So sacrifice then is another side of love.

So what if you are that husband? You love your wife dearly, but somehow you let your work take more importance.
Busy in your daily life, you forget to care for her. You forget she has needs. She has desires.
She wants to feel special. She wants to feel loved.

And fed up of you she drifts away. She wants to leave.

What do you do then?

If you truly love her, you fight for her. You put in all your heart and soul to win her back.
And it is that fight more than anything that will bring her back to you.
Nothing more great for a woman than seeing her love, love her so much as to fight for her.

Love then means you are ready to fight. You are ready to fight for her love.

But all this love thing seems so complicated. I feel the deepest admiration for people like Abdul Kalam and Mother Teresa, who have never married and may be, may be never loved a woman/man all their lives. But love is not absent from their hearts. Theirs is a love so great that we ordinary mortals can only admire.

I mean how is it to be someone like that? To be so filled with love that you love the entire world?
To be so selfless in love. To feel so much love as to not ask for anything in return?
To sacrifice yourselves for the greater good of the world?

What I want to say to all those women out there, who don't feel as loved by their husbands, give us guys another chance.
We are not so good at showing our emotions. We may not take you out for a candle light dinner everyday. But we do love you deeply. Tell us you how you feel and let us fight for you.

And to all those guys out there, it's wonderful to be loved by a woman. Don't take her for granted.

Simple things really. And they write all those books and manuals about love and relationships!!

And my greatest respect and admiration to all those men and women out there who look passion in the eye and yet resist the wrong. Because what matters is doing what is right. Even if your heart wants to do the wrong thing.I mean, after all anyone can be swayed by passion. But the strong still walk down the right path.

Passion vs Reason...its not such a simple thing after all..sometimes the only way is to follow the path and let destiny unfold.